Are you into networking?

You know, making friends with strangers and exploring how or if
you can become friends or help each other in some way, especially with your business.

There are no hard and fast rules to networking but there are a few things you must avoid!

Here are a couple of examples:

To help you avoid messing up the complex brain surgery that is networking, here are a few tips:

Never start a conversation with, “What do you do?”

By all means ask this question further into the conversation rather than your opening.
It polarizes people into categorizes too quickly and can kill the conversation stone dead or
worse, it may invite the other person to start pitching to you.
It’s best to ask some general small talk questions

When you are networking, just because someone isn’t in your main target market,
doesn’t mean they don’t know people who are.  By exploring what other events they go to,
where their network is strong, what kind of clients they deal with and who they have around them,
you begin to see them as someone who could open new doors for you.

Only ever use job titles when you want to soothe your ego and get nothing out of the meeting.
People are actually more interested in what you do than who you are.

It might sound grand being a consultant, lawyer or accountant, but it’s the difference that you make that counts.

Good networking isn’t rocket science but it does take a little thought!

]]> http://how2helpyourself.com/2010/08/how-not-to-network/feed/ 1 http://how2helpyourself.com/2010/08/free-lunch/ http://how2helpyourself.com/2010/08/free-lunch/#comments Mon, 09 Aug 2010 09:26:23 +0000 Roy http://how2helpyourself.com/?p=633

“Who Says There is No Such Thing

As A Free Lunch?”

Are you looking for that complimentary ticket

That will give you free lunches for the rest of your life?

Just make sure you know what it is that you really want

When setting your goals

Be Very careful what you ask for

For you may well get it!

Always Make it Fun!

If you want to change peoples behaviour, there are a number of different approaches to take.

You must never try to manipulate people because they will eventually see right through your tactics.

The methods used by most people are the “carrot” and “Stick” methods also known as “bully and bribe”

If you try to bully them by yelling and screaming, this may work for a short time but it is no good for you or them in the long run because you just build resentment.

Another approach would be to bribe them.  Again, this is only a short term measure because once the value of the bribe runs out, you must continue to offer more and more.

By far the best way to alter anyones behavour is to make the changes fun.

Watch this video for a great example:

Enjoy

Thank you Julie Baker for sending this link to me Hugggz from Roy

]]> http://how2helpyourself.com/2010/07/this-is-great-fun/feed/ 0 http://how2helpyourself.com/2010/06/be-careful-what-you-ask-for/ http://how2helpyourself.com/2010/06/be-careful-what-you-ask-for/#comments Fri, 25 Jun 2010 20:21:47 +0000 Roy http://how2helpyourself.com/?p=588

The story that unfolds here is a classic tail of not being precise
when asking someone else to do something for you and
of not being entirely sure of the mindset of the person
you are asking

Enjoy

Hi
I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me. It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.

This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.
Thanks Shan.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
That is shocking news. Luckily I was sitting down when I read your email and not half way up a ladder or tree. How are you holding up? I am surprised you managed to attend work at all what with thinking about Missy out there cold, frightened and alone… possibly lying on the side of the road, her back legs squashed by a vehicle, calling out “Shannon, where are you?”

Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.
Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Poster

yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
I never said I don’t like cats. Once, having been invited to a party, I went clothes shopping beforehand and bought a pair of expensive G-Star boots. They were two sizes too small but I wanted them so badly I figured I could just wear them without socks and cut my toenails very short. As the party was only a few blocks from my place, I decided to walk. After the first block, I lost all feeling in my feet. Arriving at the party, I stumbled into a guy named Steven, spilling Malibu & coke onto his white Wham ‘Choose Life’ t-shirt, and he punched me. An hour or so after the incident, Steven sat down in a chair already occupied by a cat. The surprised cat clawed and snarled causing Steven to leap out of the chair, slip on a rug and strike his forehead onto the corner of a speaker; resulting in a two inch open gash. In its shock, the cat also defecated, leaving Steven with a foul stain down the back of his beige cargo pants. I liked that cat.

Attached poster as requested.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
It’s a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.
Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny. Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please. Thanks.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism. I don’t come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I am willing to overlook this faux pas due to you no doubt being preoccupied with thoughts of Missy attempting to make her way home across busy intersections or being trapped in a drain as it slowly fills with water. I spent three days down a well once but that was just for fun.

I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it?
I just want it to say Lost.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name. Not like a movie poster or anything stupid. I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you.

Thanks.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Awww

Dear Shannon,
I don’t have a cat. I once agreed to look after a friend’s cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter, I kept the cat in a closed cardboard box in the shed and forgot about it. If I wanted to feed something and clean faeces, I wouldn’t have put my mother in that home after her stroke. A week later, when my friend came to collect his cat, I pretended that I was not home and mailed the box to him. Apparently I failed to put enough stamps on the package and he had to collect it from the post office and pay eighteen dollars. He still goes on about that sometimes, people need to learn to let go.
I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Awww

Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange.
I gave you a photo of my cat.
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Awww

I know, but that one is cute. As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this. If anybody calls and says “I haven’t seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?” you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.

I knew someone who had a basset hound that had its hind legs removed after an accident and it had to walk around with one of those little buggies with wheels. If it had been my dog I would have asked for all its legs to be removed and replaced with wheels and had a remote control installed. I could charge neighbourhood kids for rides and enter it in races. If I did the same with a horse I could drive it to work. I would call it Steven.

Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Please just use the photo I gave you.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? I have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Fine. That will have to do.

That was copied from an email sent anonymously to my daughter
If this is your work, or you know who wrote it; I would appreciate it if you could let me know, so that due credit may be given

Whoever you are

Thanks

I am indebted to all those who brought the source of this article to my attention

It is the work of David Thorne
Thank you David for giving me permission to use your work

Please visit David’s website where there are many more very funny stories:

Click this link for David’s website

http://www.27bslash6.com/missy.html

“Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.”

I love that. Dale Carnegie is an inspirational fella who has changed
the mindsets of people all over the planet, for many years now.

Yes, mindset in ANYTHING you do in life is soooo important.
If your mind cannot believe that you are capable of doing something
then you will never accomplish that goal.

So this week we have a free eBook about personal development, and I was
hoping that you could spare a minute or two and just think…
think about how your mindset it, what your dreams are
do you even allow yourself to dream anymore?
Where do you see yourself in 5 years if you keep doing what you are doing
where do you want to see yourself… and how can you get there?

OK – enough from me.

Grab your eBook Here
and.. have a great week!

I don’t know about you, but I seem to get the feeling that people are generally frustrated the Law of Attraction is not working consistently for them, ESPECIALLY in the area of wealth.

Sure, people have used the Law of Attraction to help them in many areas of life, from love and relationships to career to health. But wealth seems to be the area of priority for most people, and ironically, it also seems to be the area most people find least success in. It almost feels like there’s a correlation…

So you’ve tried positive thinking. Maybe you even have a vision board. But for some reason, you just can’t seem to unlock that “tap of wealth” using the Law of Attraction.

Is there an ingredient you’re missing?

According to Brian, most of us already KNOW the ingredients needed to attract wealth. But, in the same way a recipe is useless if you only have the ingredients and not the instructions; a recipe for wealth is pretty much useless if you only have the ingredients but not the equation.

Brian is going to leak out the equation in his upcoming webinar. (TOMORROW!) March 24^th.
I’d reserve your spot before it gets full. Register here

Brian is a successful entrepreneur and student of Bob Proctor. And there’s an Equation to Wealth no other guru has talked about that Brian is LEAKING OUT.

Could this be the most controversial event of 2010?

http://bit.ly/SGRevent

To your success

Roy

My eyes are glazed over and my mind has gone numb.  The annual trip to my accountant is the one area of my life that I have absolutely no control over and I find very confusing.

When I told my wife I’d booked our appointment with the accountant, she was furious.

“Couldn’t you have left it until later in the year, perhaps after Christmas?” she pleaded.

“No!” I reasoned, “It has to be now, the forms have to go to the taxman before the end of the year.”

“But I hate going to the accountants,” She said, “I would rather spend a day at the dentist.”

“But you hate going to the Dentist,” I reminded her.

“Well at the Dentist,” She said, “You only have a few minutes of discomfort and at least you have some idea of what is going on.

After a trip to the accountants, I always return totally confused, puzzled, bewildered, perplexed, bemused, baffled and befuddled.”
“Despite his cheery persona and words of encouragement, I feel dejected because I haven’t understood a word he said.”

Like a trip to the dentist, the initial apprehension of visiting the accountant is totally misplaced.

True to form, the visit was not exactly a relaxed picnic, more like a trip up the tower of Babel.

What language is it they speak? And why does the sound of it create instant drowsiness?

It was nearly a week ago now and I’m still having trouble focusing because my eyes are still glazed over and I am so sleepy, like I am in some kind of hypnotic trance!

Having been in business for myself fo more than 25 years, I have a preaty good understanding of how to manage my day to day affairs. However, a trip to the accountant is the one area of my life that I have absolutely no understanding of.

When I travel to a foreign country where I don’t speak the lingo, I can usually understand something of what is going on.
And you can recognise the cheeky smile from the local lads as they fleece you of your tourist dollar.

That smile that says I’m taking your money because that is what I do.  You are a rich foreigner,
I am poor local and you are making a contribution to our economy.
It is a win-win situation, all part of life’s rich pattern.
And we all have a great laugh.
When I travel to my accountants, I don’t speak the lingo and I can’t understand anything of what is going on.
And I recognise the cheeky smile.

That smile that says I’m taking your money because that is what I do.  You are a poor businessman,
I am rich accountant and you are making a contribution to my economy.
It is my win situation, all part of life’s rich pattern.
And we all have a great laugh.

The figures and tables he produces have no connection that I can make to any part of my business.
I suppose though, if the taxman understands it all then I have nothing to worry about and it has all been worthwhile.

Just to show how mind numbing I find the whole accountancy business; when I delivered my books to him back in the summer, I left a pair of my trousers in the box of papers!

You see; It was a bright sunny summer’s day (yes we did get one; I think it was on a Wednesday?)
and I was wearing short trousers to enjoy the weather.  As it was supposedly a work day,
I might have to make a business visit and therefore took long trousers with me to change into; just in case?

So when my accountant handed me back my books, my trousers were there in the box.
Yes, they were mine and what’s more, there was a £20 note in the pocket?

I wonder if I should have asked him for interest on the £20.00
Or was the note the interest on the trousers?

Something else I will never know!

Whilst checking my emails this morning, there was this one from Bill Harris.  You may
remember he was one of the stars of the Hit Film “The Secret.”

Bill is also president of Centerpointe Research Institute and as such is offered many new
books and videos to review and sometimes to offer to his subscribers.  Well this is one of
those occasions and Bill has offered me a free copy of a book that is selling well on
Amazon.  I am sure Bill won’t mind if I pass this offer on to you.

Here is his email, received this morning. Enjoy!

Dear Roy,

If you suffer from any type of back, neck or sciatic pain
then you need to go grab a copy of my good friend, Jesse
Cannone’s new book, The 7-Day Back Pain Cure ASAP..

Right now he is actually giving it away… you can also buy it
on Amazon, but if you grab one of the free copies from his
website he is going to donate $2 to St. Jude’s Children’s
Hospital or Habitat for Humanity – you even get to choos
the charity!

Click here to get your F.R.E.E copy now

https://gethealthy.infusionsoft.com/go/7DayCure/bharris/102009jv

Now, I’ve known Jesse for a while and he is known
as the “back pain relief guy” because he’s helped so many
people to finally get rid of their pain… and over the years,
I personally have learned a lot from him.

But his new book is incredible. In it he does what no one
else in the medical community does, and that is put together
all of the pieces. See, most people with back pain get
treatments that only mask the pain… and even then,
the treatments only address the physical symptoms.

In this book he shows you:

- Why traditional treatments always FAIL to deliver lasting relief

- The 7 mistakes that most people make that keep them in pain

- How to identify the real, underlying causes of your pain

- Which treatments work, which ones don’t and how to know
which is right for you.

So if you have ever suffered from back pain, or are currently
dealing with it, I highly recommend you grab a copy of his
book now – and you can’t beat the price (F-R-E-E)…

But don’t wait or “think about it” as he has only 1000 copies
available to give away and there are literally millions of people
with back pain who are likely to hear about this.

Click here to get your F.R.E.E copy now

https://gethealthy.infusionsoft.com/go/7DayCure/bharris/102009jv

And please be sure to tell him I sent you.

Be well,

Bill

P.S. Remember, there’s a limited number of books available,

so get your F-R-E-E copy at:

https://gethealthy.infusionsoft.com/go/7DayCure/bharris/102009jv

Whilst going through some papers the other day I underwent a relativity
check-up.

I was reminded of when someone asked Albert Einstein to define relativity.
He replied as follows, “When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like
a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour.
That’s relativity.”

The papers I was going through, include 2 letters that my late father sent to
his Sister Ida who was evacuated out of London during the Battle of Britain
in WW2.  In the letters he mentions taking my Mother to the cinema.

This is where my relativity check-up occurs! You see my dad was writing in
the present tense about dating my mum, seven years before I was born and
I am reading about it after they have both passed away!

Now is that relativity or what?

The letters tell a remarkable story of how one teenager tried to go about
his ‘normal’ daily life amid the death and destruction going on all around
at the time.

What is impressive is the matter-of-fact way he described the devastation
of London, night after night.

I noted too, that this teenager along with everyone else fought their
way into work the next day despite the hardships and lack of sleep
the night before.

I may sound like a grumpy old man to say this but; how does this compare
with our modern day generation? There is no hint of whinging or feeling
hard done to, everyone just carried on and made the best of their lot.

OK! Not everyone was a saint. My dad does make reference in one letter,
to the burglars and looters who made the most out of other people’s
misfortune but these were definitely in the minority.

Another surprise for me was the mention of “The Brown’s Uncle Bert made
us laugh the other night. All the evening he had been saying how he wasn’t
bothered by air raids and that he would go up to bed as normal. At ten
o’clock sharp off he went pausing at the top of the stairs to say that it was
just a case of getting used to them. At ten fifteen he was down under the
stairs with the rest of us.”

Just to put this into perspective; Uncle Bert was totally blinded in the
First World War. In the same conflict, his twin brother Horace was blown
to pieces with no trace of his body being found.

It is sad that I have no recollection of any of the locations my Dad refers
to in the letters, because the family moved to the Sussex countryside
whilst I was quite young; where I had an idyllic childhood,
so I am not complaining.

Another sadness concerns My Aunt Ida; the recipient of these letters.
Last year, we were all looking forward to her 90th birthday. However,
sadly a few weeks before the big day, she suffered a massive stroke.
She also has ‘other complications’ which have resulted in her being
placed in a nursing home in her home town in Dorset.

If you would like to read the letters referred to above,
you will find them on this blog:

http://normanaylmer.blogspot.com/

]]> http://how2helpyourself.com/2009/10/your-relativity/feed/ 0 http://how2helpyourself.com/2009/09/acres-of-diamonds/ http://how2helpyourself.com/2009/09/acres-of-diamonds/#comments Tue, 15 Sep 2009 11:29:29 +0000 Roy http://how2helpyourself.com/?p=448

Your diamonds are not in far distant mountains or in yonder seas;
They are in your own backyard, if you but dig for them. RUSSELL H. CONWELL

Few motivational talks have influenced or inspired as many people as Russell Conwell’s
speech called Acres Of Diamonds. He delivered the speech more than 6,000 times
around the world.

When it was published it became an immediate best-seller and a classic in inspirational literature.

(The book is available as a free download pdf in the members’ area of this site.
If you are not yet a member, just sign in at the top of this page)

The central idea of the work is that one need not look elsewhere for opportunity, achievement,
or fortune — the resources to achieve all good things are present in your own community.
The story Conwell told in his lecture is developed by an introductory anecdote,
told to Conwell by an Arab guide, about a Persian farmer named Ali Hafed who
wanted to find diamonds so badly that he sold his property and went off to travel the world
in a futile search for them;  He looked everywhere but he could not find the diamonds he
lusted after. Finally, alone and in despair as a homeless pauper, Ali Hafed ended his own life.
His search for riches had consumed him.

In the meantime, the man who bought the land from him was grateful for every blade of grass
that was now his and lavished love and hard work on his farm. At night, surrounded by his family
and eating the fruits of his labor, he was a contented man.

One day he made a remarkable discovery. In the backyard that All Hafed had abandoned was
a diamond mine-literally an acre of diamonds. The simple farmer became wealthy beyond his
wildest dreams.

Conwell used this parable to illustrate an extraordinary and wonderful message: within each of us
is a wellspring of abundance and the seeds of opportunity. For each of us there is a deeply personal
dream waiting to be discovered and fulfilled. When we cherish our dream and then invest love,
creative energy, perseverance, and passion in ourselves, we will achieve an authentic success.

Where is your acre of diamonds? If you could do anything in the world, what would it be?

Yes’, that very thing right now that you believe is impossible! Would you open a store, nurture a family,
record a hit record, write a screenplay? We all have an acre of diamonds waiting to be discovered,
cherished and mined.

We all have a place from where to begin. Let your imagination soar, for it is your soul’s
blueprint for success.

The new owner of his home discovered that a rich diamond mine was located right there on the property.
Conwell elaborates on the theme through examples of success, genius, service, or other virtues involving
ordinary people: “dig in your own back-yard!”

(The pdf of ‘Acres of Diamonds’ is available as a free download in the members’ area of this site.
If you are not yet a member, just sign in at the top of this page and you will be redirected to the
download area)